


kissing a fool

by bluetint



Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Masturbation, Movie References, Mythology - Freeform, at some points
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-08
Updated: 2019-03-08
Packaged: 2019-11-13 20:45:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18038714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluetint/pseuds/bluetint
Summary: Sometimes, you gotta make sacrifices to find the love you crave.





	kissing a fool

**Author's Note:**

> warning for super long author notes that seem pointless but you definitely should read:
> 
> so here it is, the cracky jjp nymph demon au which had initially started out as a pwp but it has turned into this Thing... on god, this was supposed to be a oneshot, but it's not anymore.
> 
> this au is a brainchild of me and miki (your resident jjp enabler, folks). we were joking around and now i'm a clown.
> 
> this fic is my first chaptered story, so please keep your expectations lower than jackson’s height (trust me) because this is kind of an experiment to break myself out of my comfort zone. if you’ve been following me for a while, you’ll notice i usually write shortfic or oneshots. my writing style will be all over the place as well, but _experiment_ guys, remember?
> 
> other things i will mention
> 
> \- this is mpreg/fpreg. yeah, i'm going to be clear on this from the start because i don't want y'all getting mad at me when we're halfway into the fic and i bring in the spawn.
> 
> (now if anyone's left after i dropped that lovely piece of info.... moving on)
> 
> \- if you're particular about your mythology and fantasy, you are going to hate this. so much butchery of said things has occurred. nothing makes sense.
> 
> \- yes, i'm aware nymphs are female but i'm taking liberty with this entire concept.
> 
> \- tags are going to be updated with each chapter
> 
> if at any point this fic stops making sense, remember this is a _crack_ fic. logic does not apply ^^
> 
> the folks working on this fic are college students Doing Their Best, so the update front is gonna be tricky but hope y'all have fun either way!

It is said that the most marvelous of love stories are often found in fairytales. I suppose that is correct. 

For where else would you find shall you find, the story of a well-read woman falling in love with a cursed Beast? Or a donkey marrying a dragon and having quaint horse-lizard babies?

I mean, you don’t see that kinda shit in the real world, that’s for sure.

This story goes a little like this too. It is the story of a nymph and a demon who find themselves falling for each other (although that part comes later) despite their strange circumstances.

Now this story is a little weird and probably not as fun as I’m making it sound. Although, the word nymph might bring to mind Greek mythology in all its fuckery, the author has taken liberty with the concept and put her own special spin on it with the help of some dear friends.

Have you ever wondered how nature has been around as long as it has? How these sprawling forests, intimidating landforms and sinuous water bodies, came to be? 

Well, now some might argue the Big Guy did it. Others would pose that the world ran itself and there were forces beyond our comprehension that ran things. People are allowed to hold whatever opinion they want. It's like genitalia, everyone has some. 

In this story however, the Earth has been maintained by magical creatures. People refer to them by many names, but we shall call them, nymphs. 

Which brings us to the peak of this mountain, the foot of which was brimming with greenery and various life forms.

Or, _had_ been.

Tall, graceful oaks had been cut down to stumps. The ground, once covered with a soft green carpet, had been burnt black. Birds that had sung and deer that had wandered about were nowhere to be found. It was empty as if a band of thieves had barged in, looking to steal precious jewels but had destroyed everything in a fit of rage when their search had yielded nothing. 

The Forest King, or Father as everyone liked to call him, along with his entourage, floated a few feet off the ground, surveying the damage. Their expressions were grim. 

“So the rumors are true then.” The query is addressed to Hakyeon, the leader of the centaurs. He was covered from head to hoof in bruises, yet he stood tall and fierce.

“Yes, your Highness.”

Minjun glances towards south, in the direction of a mountain that’s set apart from the others. Devil’s Peak they called it, and for good reason. The huge skull head with horns mounted atop it made for a frightening picture. The creature inhabiting it, however, was more frightening. It was that same creature that had brought destruction to the clearing that had been home to the centaurs.

“Was anyone taken?”

“No your highness. We're all here.”

“Thank goodness,” breathed out Hyerim, one of the healers. She was tending to the stumps that were still alive, that hadn’t died out in the fire.

The normally laid back Queen, or Mother, mind you, Sunmi, was eerily silent the entire time. Her eyes were alight with cold fury, the kind that promised excruciating pain. Her inky black hair and blood red lips only made her more intimidating. No one dared speak to her.

“Any casualties?” asked Minjun, bending down to place a palm on the earth, which had been scorched black. As if destroying the homes of many hadn’t been enough, they’d even set it ablaze. The ground whimpered, as if in grievous pain. He retracted his hand, apologetic. 

“The Harvest is almost upon us,” Hakyeon pointed out. Indeed, it was only a few full moons away. “They will try again, they are desperate -”

“They will not get what they want.” Sunmi’s quiet voice cuts through like a knife. “We will not let them.”

They all nodded, looking at mountain. The moonlight shone over the lower half of the skull’s face. The sharp teeth glowed, as if in a menacing smile full of promise. 

\---

A Few Months Later 

“Dig a tunnel, dig dig a tunnel, dig a tunnel!”

“When you’re done, you dig a bigger tunnel!”

“Dig a tunnel, dig dig a tunnel!”

“Quick before the hyena cooooome!” 

“Guys, that’s a den,” sighs Jihyo. “Do _not_ dig any tunnels.”

“I cannot believe you’re letting them sing this,” said Jeongyeon, scooping up the daisies in her palms.

The voices of Yugyeom, Youngjae and Bambam, blend together to create a surprising harmony. However, the content of the song was not appropriate for the situation. The situation being them digging up a den for Sana’s pet foxes.

Well, it had started out with one fox, which had turned into two and had now become five. The male fox was alight with pride as the vixen nursed their three cubs. 

“The audience isn’t complaining, so why should I?” Jihyo answers her. Indeed, the foxes, instead of being offended were actually moving in tune to their voices, fluffy tails swishing to and fro. Sana might as well be one of the foxes herself, the way she was bobbing her head to the tune. 

The female fox had been found as a cub, abandoned near the riverside. Sana had raised it from infancy to adulthood and it had been fine until she’d brought home a paramour… which had resulted in an expansion and now there was not enough room in their house for three girls and five foxes.

Jeongyeon was relocating the plants that had been dug out in the process of digging the new den, making sure they were adjusting to the change of place. The sunflowers griped about having to lose their sunny spot, but immediately piped down when she apologized and placed them in a spot where they could get ample sunshine. 

After sending the digging party off to get some hay, Sana inspects the inside, only casting the layer of protective spells when she’s satisfied.

Yugyeom and Bambam, having decided to make a flower wreath for the den entrance, had gone to collect some material for it. Youngjae had been sent along to make sure they came back but was now nursing a headache because of their incessant bickering.

“I am telling you,” Bambam pressed, as he came closer, “rushes would look nicer! With a smattering of lilies on top!” 

“But,” Yugyeom returned, “reeds are sturdier!” 

“They’re also ugly.”

“But at least they do the job!”

“Just combine both of them,” sighed Youngjae. He liked to live quietly, a wise approach, but sometimes, even he got caught up in the heat of things.

Bambam gasps, as if Youngjae had uttered something utterly blasphemous. “Have you no sense of aesthetic?”

“I’m a dryad,” Youngjae answered, quite dryly. They had no use for trivial things such as silly ornamentation.

“No wonder you’re dry as fuck,” muttered Bambam, dropping the pile of rushes to the floor.

“Leave my boyfriend out of this,” snapped Yugyeom, dropping his pile of reeds to argue better.

And they’re at it again.

The thing about Yugyeom and Bambam is, once they’re off there’s no stopping until they both tire themselves out. Trying to intervene would just be stupid but they couldn’t leave them here either. The poor foxes, now ensconced in their den, didn’t deserve this racket. Also, Father would be most displeased to find that their population had been cut short by two digits.

Youngjae finishes placing the hay inside, leaving the foxes to climb inside and settle. Jihyo pats him on the back comfortingly.

Sana looks at the cause of strife lying in a heap. “Say, haven’t we been low on baskets lately?”

Jeongyeon glanced over, confused. “We have?”

“But didn’t we just weave twelve dozen baskets the other day?” 

“Of course,” says Sana. The witch flicked one finger at the pile Bambam and Yugyeom had so painstakingly gathered. It starts moving towards them, quite silent for a pile of sticks and leaves.

The three of them look from Sana to the bickering threesome. And then back to her again. They all catch on to what she was implying.

“Well,” hedges Jeongyeon, as she bent down to pick up some of it, “I suppose we could make more.”

Jihyo agrees. They’d deal with the fallout later. “I suppose.”

Youngjae takes some as well. “Might as well do something to distract myself from this pain.”

Sana, partly because she was a skilled nymph and partly because she was a show off, snapped her fingers and presto, and some of the plants weave themselves into a compact wreath in mid-air. Jeongyeon and Jihyo tap it with one finger each. Tiny pink and yellow daisies bloom on it.

“That’s pretty,” comments Youngjae. “But don’t tell Bambam I said that.”

“They’re going to be pretty mad,” Jihyo says. The scrappy pair had moved further down the hill, but their voices were still pretty clear. They were arguing over _who_ got to make the wreath now.

The father and mother fox, along with their pair of darling children, are left to watch the argument with the interest of amused spectators, from the comfort of their lovely den, now adorned with a gorgeous wreath. 

Nothing but another normal morning in the wilderness, kids.

\---

The Monkey Face Orchids needed to be watered but the haze of lust that had descended upon his brain clouded all logical reasoning. Waking up with a tent in his pants was nothing new for him, but he hadn't one as... _severe_ as the one he was dealing with right now.

He'd knocked the potted pothos off his bedside table in his haste to get to the oil. The guilt was brief, the raging fire in his loins took precedence over everything.

Almost there, he thought, throat dry and chest heaving with the effort of jerking himself off furiously. 

His nipples were swollen from being pinched and pulled, and slick with oil. As was his stomach. He smelled of coconut and sweat. What a lovely way to start the morning.

Usually a few friendly pats did the job but seemed like he'd have to do more than that to come anytime soon.

Slicking his fingers with more oil (and spilling some of it on his sheets in his haste) he pushed one inside none too gently, hissing as it went in. Usually he would try to make as little noise as possible, but the lusty fog that had settled over his brain like a blanket of snow, he was being... quite the opposite of discreet.

Sometimes, he wished he wasn't so annoying about commitment so he could get dick anytime he wanted.

One finger becomes three and the strokes become rougher, faster and uncoordinated. With one last squeeze and twist of his fingers, he orgasms, spilling over himself and the sheets.

The enjoyment of basking in the afterglow is ruined by his overactive brain presenting a list of things he had to get done today coupled by an obnoxious knock on the door. Said knock is accompanied by the equally obnoxious voice of his aged neighbor, Mrs. Kang, inquiring in a quavery voice as to why her flowers hadn't been watered yet.

Good fucking morning to me, thought Jinyoung sourly and rolled his shaky self out of bed.

\---

Life as a nymph isn’t what humans think it to be. They aren’t covered from head to toe in flowers (unless you counted their tattoos), nor can they make the vegetation sing and dance. And no, they do not fuck trees, thank you very much.

They were your average magical creature, going around doing average magical things.

Mrs. Kang's garden greets him with the sound of incessant chattering. Her modest garden boasted a fine selection of plants but the Monkey-Faced Orchids were her pride. Dutifully, they were watered every morning, and after that every few hours. Yet with all the racket they made you’d think they were being starved.

Or it was because their owner was an aged gremlin. Who knew.

Jinyoung was glad there were a couple of trees between their houses because he could not imagine waking up to this din every morning.

"Yes, yes, I hear you," he tells them as he carefully tips the pail of water over them. The chattering fades to contented sighs as the orchids turn to face them, their monkey faces twisted in pleasure as cool water rained over them.

Mrs. Kang watched him with beady eyes. In all the years he'd worked for this woman, Jinyoung didn't think he'd ever seen her crack a smile. He wondered, as he went around the garden, if she even knew how. She was pretty good at griping and nitpicking. 

He walks to the farthest corner of the yard and bends down, setting the bucket beside him.

"And how are you doing, miss?" Jinyoung asks Old Lady. The cactus, turns towards him, bashfully presenting itself. Lady was the oldest plant in Mrs. Kang's garden and also the shyest. He still remembered the day when Sunmi had handed the pot to him, with orders to give it to the old woman as a welcome gift. He adored all the plants he worked for, but some of them held a soft spot in his heart. Like this lady over here, sitting quietly in her circle of white stones.

Lady had little brothers and sisters now, that were nestled in the earth but she still preferred having her own space. He looks over the others, making sure they were doing well and pushing his fingers inside the soil to judge the level of moisture. Lady nudges his fingers, an almost imperceptible motion.

"Good girl," he whispers softly, admiring the top of its head. The ring of tiny purplish flowers has bloomed fully, making it appear as if it was wearing a crown. Smiling, Jinyoung feels the petals, mindful of the soft bristles the entire time. 

“Stop mooning over my cactus and get a move on, son.” Trust gremlins to ruin a good moment. “In my days, the youth were never this sloppy! Chop chop!” She waves her gnarled wood cane at him.

“Yes ma’am!” he shouts back at her. Turning, he runs his whole palm over her Lady’s bristles one last time, knowing she wouldn't hurt him. "She’s a grumpy old witch, isn’t she?" he whispers to her.

Lady nods, as best as a cactus can nod because they don't have necks. Jinyoung laughs, a silent sound and stands back up, going back to work.

\---

Living in a magical forest meant there was never a dull moment. The groundhogs would bring tidbits of juicy gossip from far and wide. The trees would impart unearthly wisdom, for they had _seen things_. The ground would rumble and shake, laughing over some joke it had heard a few acres away.

Someone (read: Hyunwoo) would lose a cat or two to the devil's snare once in a while. 

And then some unfortunate sod would hang a few feet above the snare to retrieve the thing in question. Unfortunate sod number two would hold onto the rope tied to unfortunate sod number one. 

Said sods were Changkyun and Hoseok respectively. 

“How the fuck does this always happen?” Minhyuk asks from his crouch atop a thick, sturdy oak branch. He's shining a light over the whole situation with his glowing ass. One of his ancestors had been a firefly. Yeah, don't ask. “How does one just lose a beloved pet to a notorious plant over and over?”

“When one isn't thinking with their brain,” Kihyun tells them. He was most unimpressed by this series of events, having been dragged out of his precious bed to go help find some stray felines. But he loved Hyunwoo and he didn't want his husband murdered by an emotionally overwrought Jooheon for losing one of his babies either. 

“I think we should've gone with Plan A,” Hoseok says. His grip on the rope is rather tight. Changkyun looks rather serene for someone hanging a few inches above a lethal plant.

“I don't think using red chili powder is a smart move either.” Jinyoung tells him. Spices were one of the ways you could immobilize a snare temporarily. Sadly, they were out of cinnamon powder, but Minhyuk insisted chili powder would work fine. They disagreed.

“But doing _this_ is better?” Hoseok fires back. 

They continue to argue back and forth. Gucci sleeps, blissfully unaware. How the fuck had it even gotten there?

“How did he lose her again?” Hyungwon interrupted, standing a few feet to Jinyoung’s right. 

“He was knitting.”

Collective groaning ensues. 

“For the cats?”

“Yes,” sighs Kihyun. 

Some more exasperated groaning happens.

“Claiming they would get cold?”

“Yes. “

“And the cats snuck off during?” 

“Yes.”

“Didn't that happen the last time too?” 

“Yes.” 

“And yet,” sighs Changkyun, “we're still going to be putting him in charge of these brats again,” Hyunwoo did love the cats and would be quite heartbroken if he didn’t get to watch over them. Even if he didn’t do a stellar job of it.

“… yes. “

Collective sighing ensues. 

Most of the snares in the forest were mild mannered unless provoked. This one in particular, was a meanie. Anything it touched, it refused to part with. But Jooheon was also attached to the currently pregnant feline. Climbing down and retrieving it before the ironsmith found out was their only option. 

“Don't drop me,“ warns Changkyun as Hoseok lowers him down. 

Hoseok gasps, as if offended Changkyun would even think that. “I would _never_.”

“Let's just hope Gucci doesn't decide to give birth - “ starts Kihyun. Gucci, who'd been asleep suddenly sits up and starts howling, rotund belly aquiver. 

Everyone starts yelling, because who the fuck tempts fate in a situation like this?

_“Dude. “_

_“Why the fuck would you say that -”_

Jinyoung sighed, thinking back to the begonias he’d been tending to. They’d gotten too big for their pots, obscuring his view of the outside. He’d been in the middle of transferring them to the garden when he’d been dragged here. He hoped nothing got to the plants on his absence. The raccoons in the vicinity could be a nuisance.

A couple of twigs falling into his face brings him back to the attention at hand. Somehow, Minhyuk and Kihyun had gotten into some disagreement and were now pushing at each other. The shorter man gives the taller one a mighty push.

They all watch, mouths open, as Minhyuk wobbles but regains his balance. The clear vial of chilli powder tips out of his pant pocket. The cork, as if being pulled out by some invisible hand, popped out in mid-air. In mocking slow-motion it descends to the ground, and the powder spills, spreading like mist and settles over the viridescent vines like crimson dust.

There is a beat of silence. 

And then hell breaks loose. 

\-----

**Author's Note:**

> come find me on [cc](https://curiouscat.me/hoesides)!


End file.
